Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
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