My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
