I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
