He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
