Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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