Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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