would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
