what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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