I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
