i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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