I must be too annoying 4 u.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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