Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
My vagina is officially offended.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize
