I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
