Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
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