So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
