Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
