her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
