I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
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