turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
