Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
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