They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
