She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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