Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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