..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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