At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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