did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
