What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
