New low: just hacked my moms facebook
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize