Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
