I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
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