Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
there was a trapeze. enough said
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
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