I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
