Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Randomize
