the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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