also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Randomize
