I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
it's like heaven, but drunker
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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