then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
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