He is such a slut. More and more my type.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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