nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
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I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
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The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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