You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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