"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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