I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
