worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
