Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
