I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
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