i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
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