My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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