Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
