you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
