You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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