btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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