i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
